Two kinds of girls.

I’m starting to believe there are two kinds of girls in this world. I’m not sure if it’s due to attitude, circumstance, or experiences we’ve witnessed, but I am sure that these two types of women couldn’t be more different from each other. 

In full disclosure, I struggled with this blog. I initially planned to launch it from a purely professional place. But I soon realized that wouldn’t allow me to share some of the different avenues of my life. Tonight’s blog post will border the line of too much disclosure, but I’m okay with that. I’ve spent months trying to keep all of my topics happy and upbeat, and while this post won’t be a total downer, it will shed some light on a situation that’s brought me a great deal of stress the last few months.

You see last summer I started dating someone. It was easily the most fun I’ve ever had getting to know someone, and I’m grateful for the laughs we shared. But it ended very quickly. I’m intentionally omitting a great deal of details here because this story is less about him and more about his then ex-girlfriend.

Listen, I know from experience it sucks to be an ex to someone you’ve really cared for. I mean, hello, who actually appreciates the title “ex”? But this girl tainted our entire relationship very early on. She actually brought it to a close when she started threatening me through Facebook messages (from different profiles), leaving hateful comments on my Instagram page, and, you might have seen this coming, emailing my personal blog. Now, let me be clear, he isn’t off the hook for lying and cheating. Plainly and simply, I refused to accept that and the moment I had proof I ended the relationship. That was also the last day he and I talked.

But this ex of his decided to take him back. No judgment, but that’s just not something I would do. Perhaps I’m just wiser and more mature, but I’ve reached a point in my life where I’m no longer willing to accept less than I feel I deserve. I’ve got too much going on to give out second chances to people who blatantly disrespect the first chance they got – just not my style. But what I wasn’t prepared for was her constant harassing that’s continued as recently as today. She still emails me, comments on my blog and attempts to call and text me with threats and hateful comments. Truth be told, I just don’t understand. Her anger is so misguided to me, especially given the fact that he and I both cut all ties. Yet, her threats continue.

That’s when it hit me. There are two types of girls in this world. Those that grow, evolve and embrace life’s lessons. Some of them come harder than others, but at the end of the day, strong women know what’s in their best interest. They’re unapologetic and unafraid to dream and demand what they know they deserve, especially when it comes to love and relationships. I’m no expert, hell, not even close. But I do have confidence in myself and what I bring to the table, enough to walk away from situations that I know I shouldn’t tolerate.

And there are women like her. Who are so clouded by insecurity and doubts. Possibly due to the lies they’ve been told and the scars they’ve been handed by the hands they’ve loved. Who act irrational and lash out to complete strangers they feel threatened by.

Girls who are reading this, don’t be the second type. You will experience love that drags you through the wringer, but don’t let it change you for the worse. Choose you. And women, who have let the wrong love teach them, you inspire me. Continue being a strong, proud, beautiful woman, who is loved and respected for exactly who you are.


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